Saturday, October 10, 2009

trust, live, rejoice, rely in all these new things...

I (as I seem to have written before) have meant to sit down all week and write. It just hasn't happened.

This week has been eventful to say the least!!

Among many other things, I received a job offer at the beginning of the week. It's one I applied for a while back, but had to keep low key for various reasons. Now that it is more public knowledge in our church, I am able to share it here. I am now the new administrator for our church.

I am so excited. I have no idea what the job holds. It's part time, so I will be able to still be with the kids a lot of the week. I am going to be working Monday through Wednesday, and on those days, the kids grandfather (retired) will be watching Marina, and picking up Peter from school.

It is going to make our life extremely busy! (not that it wasn't before!!!) But it is needed income at the moment, and I think really fits a need in the church, and most probably a need in my personal life, spiritual life. I don't know for sure, but God does, and He knows what He has planned for me.

We also had the opportunity to take the daughter of a family friend with us to AWANA with the kids this week. She loved it. Our kids loved having her there.

In an un-typical move (for me) I told this young lady's mother that if she enjoyed it and wanted to go again, to just let us know and we could pick her up every week. I gave her some of the details in an email.... it now sounds like we may be adding V. to our number for Wednesday nights.

I am really excited about V coming with us. I am thrilled that her mom and dad want her to go, and that she was excited about it. She is about 2 years older than Peter, is reading, and is a very bright young lady. She is going to have no problems memorizing the scripture verses each week, and will very quickly be able to keep up with the class of kids. She and Peter will be in the Sparks group for this year, as they go from Kindergarten through second grade.

She is in second grade in Peter's school, and I think it will be good for both of them to be together for this year. The more I learn about AWANA (this is my first exposure through my own kids... I never had the opportunity for something like this myself as a child) the more I am glad that the kids get to be in it. Not only does it put value on learning more about God, Jesus, and who He is, and what it means to have Him in our lives, it gives ownership to the kids.

From all I have read and listened to, the kids are encouraged to make personal choices to follow Jesus. They are encouraged to read Scripture, to memorize it and to treasure it. It isn't just memorizing to get levels and patches for their vests. They are taught the meaning behind each verse and what it looks like applied to their lives.

I am so glad to have an outside source to try to bring these ideas home to the kids.
I am so glad that our friends want their daughter to come with us.
I am so glad that we got involved in AWANA despite my hesitation at the beginning!

This could be a really stressful few months for me as I settle in and adjust to the working environment, and settling in with the kids on a routine, etc.

Please pray for this transition!

I got off the phone with Karen, the kids' grandmother and my mother-in-law, and she and Joe (the retired grandpa ;) ) were not realizing that for the first 4+ weeks I would need their help 3 days a week. They were still anticipating only Monday and Tuesday needing to watch them.

When I clarified that I was going to really need them three days a week, so I could get my 24 hours in, she seems a bit taken aback. She understood once I told her that Dave's schedule was that far out, and he couldn't request off Wednesdays on schedules already posted. If he were to get a Wednesday off, he would have to trade hours with someone, if there were someone who wanted to trade.

It makes it harder for me to think of leaving the kids when I know that there might possibly be a problem.....

..... but I know that is borrowing from the future, and that isn't what God wants.

I am using a devotional to help focus me for just a few minutes in the morning before my day gets jump started. I later can come back to God and get a deeper refreshment from Him... but I start my morning with this devotional and a few moments of consciously resting in His arms.

Today's devotional I had to re-read just now, especially after finding myself starting to worry about expectations, and what my in-laws might be thinking about being "saddled" with the kids so I can work.. And I immediately started brainstorming ways that we could make things work without putting the kids on their hands further.

This is from the devotional given to be my a "bloggy" buddy. :) It's called "Jesus Calling. Enjoying Peace in His Presence." It is written in first person, as if it is God speaking directly to you.

Check out how timely this was!

October 10
Trust Me enough to let things happen without striving to predict or control them. Relax and refresh yourself in the Light of My everlasting Love. My Love-Light never dims, yet you are often unaware of My radiant Presence. When you project yourself into the future, rehearsing what you will do or say, you are seeking to be self-sufficient: to be adequate without My help. This is a subtle sin - so common it usually slips by unnoticed.
The alternative is to live fully in the present, depending on Me each moment. Rather than fearing your inadequacy, rejoice in my abundant supply. Train your mind to seek My help continually, even when you feel competent enough to handle something yourself. Don't divide your life into things you can do by yourself and things that require My help. Instead, learn to rely on Me in every situation. This discipline will enable you to enjoy life more and to face each day more confidently.
(emphasis mine)

Talk about speaking right into where I'm at. Rather than fearing, and focusing on the future that I am NOT able to change one whit, by worrying about it, I need to rest in Him, rejoice in God's abundant supply in my life. My own inadequacy, my own insufficiency is all opportunity for God to be glorified.


Oh God, I so want you to be glorified in all I do. I don't want to live only parts of my life surrendered to you. I want all of my life to be surrendered to you... every last bit of it. I am tired of trying to live on my own, of trying to make things work in and of my own strength, and only running to you when my strength runs out.
I can't thank you enough Jesus, that you take me as I am - many times flat on my face in the dust - and you redeem my life from the pit. How incredible that you love me that much!
May I live in the reality of that each day. I don't do well with that usually, and I find myself "planning" things out in advance. None of that really works. Only you work. Why do I constantly find myself trying to do those things on my own, when in reality only complete dependence on you works?
Reform my thinking, change my heart. Uproot old habits, refocus my gaze. May I be pleasing in your sight. May all the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to you.
Show me more and more what it means that you delight in me, and how to further delight myself in you! Thank you so much, Jesus for delighting in me, for creating me for that relationship with you, for desiring to be close to me all my days. Thank you for giving me a purpose as simple and complex as delighting in you. In everything and through everything.
I love you.
Goodnight, sweet Jesus.


4 comments:

Clay Feet said...

This is so inspirational. And this quote about living in the present reminded me of something God impressed on me some years ago. This concept is actually one and the same with the idea of God's presence. When I begin to worry about the future or lament the past, I am stepping away from God's presence, for His presence is always in the present. I have to first rest in the present/presence before I can let go of both the future and the past and trust Him with both of those.

Laura said...

I'm excited for you in this new opportunity, Heather! I'll pray that the transition will be smooth, that your in-laws will enjoy their time with the kids, and just that everything will be for His glory!

Yay, for you!

Deb said...

Heather,

I thought about you today.

Prayed for you.

Blessings on you and on your family as you start this new job.

Recent circumstances have provided a huge challenge for me continue to rest in Him.

Thanks for sharing your heart about this topic.

Sweet dreams.

Paula (SweetPea) said...

Congrats on the job. May you be able to rest and trust Him, not worrying over your in laws. They may be hesitant but trust God with their hesitancy. It just might be a blessing in disquise for them. Many times I dread doing something and it turns out to be okay, let alone even nice, such as a blessing. Leave their hesitancy in His hands.

I like the first line of the devo:
"Trust Me enough to let things happen without striving to predict or control them." I always enjoy too the devos spoken in first person as though God's speaking straight to our hearts.